Tag Archives: Trident

Empire warn thousands of jobs at risk if Death Star scrapped

Darth Vader, the Galactic Empire’s Defence Minister, today warned Ewoks that removing the controversial Death Star from their homeworld of Endor would result in the loss of thousands of jobs.

Vader Death Star“The Rebel threat has not gone away”, warned Lord Vader in his regular Daily Mail column, “In terms of uncertainty and potential risk it has, if anything, increased. What’s more, moving the Death Star to another location would come at the cost of thousands of jobs, which would be devastating to the local economy”.

However, not everyone agrees with Vader’s doom-laden warnings.

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Bombs not bairns!

Alright, so it hardly took Mystic Meg to predict that the much-trumpeted cross-party vow to devolve more power to Holyrood might be broken. What is surprising is how quickly the whole thing has unraveled, in a blackly comical display of the worst of Westminster’s back-stabbing brand of politics.

Less than 24 hours after the polls closed, Labour had back-tracked on their timetable. Then came their party conference.

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